- He’s busy
- His phone has been dead for the last week (hah)
- His ex girlfriend (probably named something cool and classy like Tulip or Bethany) showed up on his doorstep the other night while we were deep in conversation and begged for him to take her back and she probably brought along like some kind of fruit pie that she made from scratch and was naked under the Burberry trench coat she was wearing all while I was laying in my bed in a pair of long johns and a sweatshirt, eating a bowl of ramen that was slightly undercooked and looking at google images of mouth herpes
- He saw that picture of me in an ill fitting turtleneck holding a PBR that my best friend posted on Facebook and realized I probably wasn’t the one
- He saw almost any picture of me on the internet, excluding the handful I carefully picked for my online profile
- He found my Twitter
- or Instagram
- Gay
- He realized that dick joke I made actually was in poor taste
- He’s a dude
- Internet dating culture (really, you can blame pretty much anything on modern technology)
- He’s a manchild (ugh, aren’t they all, though)
- He has been abducted by aliens
- Or kidnapped by the drug lord he owes money for and as much as he begs, they won’t give him his phone, even just to send ONE DAMN TEXT
- He dropped his phone because he was so deep in thought about me that he wasn’t paying enough attention while trying to write a text about how infatuated he had become while peeing, and even now, right at this very moment, five days later, he is sitting in front of his soggy, wet phone crying and trying to come up with a different way to get in touch with me again (Facebook would work, but we will give him the benefit of the doubt and assume he hasn’t thought of that yet)
- He simply lost interest, and no longer finds it necessary to reply to me, which would be totally acceptable if I wasn’t a crazy, obsessive lady bitch who had already dreamed up the next twenty years together
- LoloOloLol lol dudes just suck
schwarkattack 